Dementia

My mother has dementia & is completely uncommunatcative. All I can do is hold her hand. I wonder if she would enjoy some delicious smelling aromatherapy on her hands. What would you recommend? MB, Aldeburgh

Smell is one of the most primitive senses and hence it is often the last to fail.

I suggest that you use a fragrance-free base cream and to every tablespoon of cream (ideally placed in a little rice bowl or a very open cup) add 2 -4 drops of essential oils. Green Mandarin and/or May Chang and/or Geranium with a couple of drops of Lavender will all be good blends to calm an agitated mind and help focus. Cinnamon, Peppermint, Orange Sweet, Eucalyptus and Rosemary can all bring back strong memories and be incredibly effective at bringing the person into the present. However they are all quite stimulating for the skin so must be spot tested carefully.

When my husbands Gran had Alzheimer's and severe cataracts I used to let her mix the mixture herself using a cotton bud - which she enjoyed. I then gently stroked the cream onto her hands (if the person is very frail then a massage can be too much) maintaining contact with both my hands and concentrating on the fleshy pads at the base of her thumb and the pads of her hands. I also massaged up her arms onto what muscle was left. It helps improve circulation and mobility and the moisture was much needed.

Whilst I was massaging her hands I rested her feet on a heated wheat bag (microwave heat cushion) which I had dropped a little Lavender and Peppermint onto. If I had time, I rested her feet in a bowl of warm water into which I had put round pebbles from the beach (that definitely brought back memories). Most of the time we worked in silence but I felt that I was communicating with her and it was noticeable that she relaxed. She also liked having her hair brushed with a real bristle brush onto which I had tissued a hint of Rosemary. Improving the circulation to the scalp can potentially help with circulation generally.

She also had a little Lavender cushion in her room and whenever she had visitors they all knew to drop a few drops on to sweeten the air and help her stay calm. In her bedroom or bathroom where there was occasionally an odour we tucked tissues down the back of the radiator which had a few drops of May Chang and Geranium on. Essential oils are much kinder to a delicate chest than the synthetic chemicals in commercial air fresheners.